Loneliness is not caused by lack of contact with people as much as it is by lack of connection to ourselves. To our divine ground. Sometimes the easiest place to feel lonely is in a relationship or in a crowd. The cure for loneliness is not other people. The cure for loneliness is deep and profound contact with the Self.

Our society constantly encourages people to live outside the Self. Do you ever find yourself looking outside yourself for what it is that you’ve been told would make you ‘happy’? A new partner, more sex, more money, a better house, a nicer car, holidays, more consumer goods and gadgets.

Desire

Think about a time you wanted something badly, that you made a lot of effort to get. Then something else appeared on your radar and you pursued that, and on and on it goes. The root of this dynamic is pure desire, which is a wonderful thing. When we’re desiring we’re in touch with the heartbeat of the universe. We feel more alive, turned on. It’s a beautiful thing. We naturally have desires not just for things and experiences, but desires to contribute, to make a difference, to know that what we do in life has meaning, that there’s a purpose for our existence, that we matter.

Yet when this wondrous force of desire sprouts from a state of inner disconnection and dissatisfaction it can become a relentless craving for things and experiences, for a feeling of power and control over the lives of others. This may keep the wheels of commerce turning and it may seem ‘normal’ because it’s how so many people function. But it’s a lonely and ultimately deeply unfulfilling, painful way to live.

Fulfilment

Fulfilment and dissatisfaction can’t occupy the same space. When you’re feeling fulfilled you’re back in touch with your power. Your power to discern and decide what YOU truly want in your life instead of unconsciously striving for ‘more’. That is society’s agenda, which can never make you truly happy. It never has, has it?

 

About the author 

Abi O'Donovan

Hi, I'm Abi O'Donovan. I work with men over 40 who worry about their sexual performance, are frustrated they can't last longer in bed, or sometimes can't get or sustain an erection, even though their doctor says they can find no reason why.

In my life I relish; both solitude and good company, tending my beautiful garden in Ireland, tootling around the Wicklow hills in my vintage MX5, good wine, slow touch, and the soul-reviving pleasure of contemplation in nature.

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