Whilst attending an event one evening, a young woman walked into the room. Wearing a short red dress and high heels. She'd a stunning figure, and an energy field that extended way beyond her physical body. A 21st Century Aphrodite, the epitome of feminine grace, power and sexual allure.

Her presence commanded attention and I wasn't the only one to notice her. As I gazed, captivated by this woman, I gasped as a sudden realisation hit me "Oh my God, she reminds me of me!"


The next day, I reminded myself that the masters live in the world of transformation, not the illusion of gain and loss. So grabbing a flip chart sheet and a marker, I wrote this question across the top of the page "What form is my power in now?"

Words began tumbling onto the page. As they did, the need for a second heading became clear, which was "What do I now have power to?"

I decided to keep this sheet open, feeling sure there was more to add to it. Indeed, the next couple of days saw me return to it again and again. Until it read...

But why am I telling you this, you might ask? And why now?

Because as we turn a corner into a new year, there's momentum for looking forward. The turn of a year is a time when one chapter in the book of life comes to an end as another begins. 

I often ask a man some version of "What would you like to get from working with me?  And one of the most oft-repeated responses begins with the phrase "I want to get back to..."

Yet the river of life flows in one direction, becoming more powerful with each turn. It never goes back to being a stream. To being less than it has become.

The point of power is in this present moment, and it's possible to develop and enjoy new forms of power at any time.

Owning The Form Your Power Is In Now

Think about it; how can you feel, or be, in charge of your own life if you don't own and acknowledge the form your power is in now?

Because power is central to the experience of being human.

Evolution likewise. Yet we pay lip service, if that, to this truth.

In a culture that fears aging, we're not encouraged to recognise new forms of power as we evolve. 

Yet it's essential to do so because power doesn't exist in yesterday. Yesterday ended last night. Today is a new day, a new beginning.

It's vital that you own and acknowledge the form your power is in today.

Because what will crush your confidence is believing...

  • Your best days are behind you.
  • You were powerful once but you're not now.
  • You won't be powerful again.

Ask yourself...

Who looks at a mature oak and sees more majesty in a sapling?

At a magnificent swan and sees more grace in a duckling?

Or at a richly-fragranced mature rose and sees deeper richness in a bud?

Yes, there's another reason why I'm sharing this with you now. It's to encourage you to do this exercise for yourself and revel in what it will reveal to you.

It's a real confidence booster; fun, enlightening and empowering. 

Once you start, repeat the question to yourself "What form is my power in now?" You're likely to find words jumping onto the page. As truth that's long awaited discovery is set free.

Tips To Help You Kick-start The Process!

Now if you fear you'll be staring at a blank sheet, here's a few questions to help you kick-start the process...

  • When do I feel at my most peaceful? (Yes, power and peace go together. Stress is what jams up the works!)
  • When I feel at my most powerful, where am I? Who am I with? What am I doing?
  • What am I good at?
  • What do I enjoy doing, that I do better now than before?
  • What do I love doing?
  • What am I passionate about, or what new passions am I discovering?
  • What are the gifts that time and experience have garnered for me? (That I don't always see when I'm looking back at what I no longer have or can do.)
  • What does my partner enjoy most about being with me now?
  • What do my family and friends love about me?
  • What are the qualities my boss/clients/co-workers most appreciate about me?

Look for forms of power that may be so familiar to you that you could easily overlook them. The possibility is that there's much others see as powerful about you that you don't recognise.

Trust There's A Timing For Everything

As I was writing this post I spotted a couple of glaring omissions to my own list. Items that belong to the ‘power to’ category.

The first is, power to do the work I do today. Because 10, 20 years ago I was too busy having fun and obsessed with my own  journey. I wouldn't have had the maturity to do so then.

Although during this time I was gathering invaluable life experience that would one day enable me to do so. 

The second is, power to hold a safe space. Something it takes time to mature into. 

There's a timing for everything. Sometimes the hard part is to trust that.

So What Form Is My Power In Now?

This could be the most important question to ask yourself today.

Because when you own and acknowledge that, you'll put a solid foundation under yourself for the New Year.  

There's a massive difference between setting goals or making resolutions for a New Year, coming from a place of feeling disempowered, or wanting to go 'back' to anything, to standing on a firm foundation of knowing and owning the power you have and are now.

About the author 

Abi O'Donovan

Hi, I'm Abi O'Donovan. I work with men over 40 who worry about their sexual performance, are frustrated they can't last longer in bed, or sometimes can't get or sustain an erection, even though their doctor says they can find no reason why.

In my life I relish; both solitude and good company, tending my beautiful garden in Ireland, tootling around the Wicklow hills in my vintage MX5, good wine, slow touch, and the soul-reviving pleasure of contemplation in nature.

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