What did you learn about nudity growing up?
That it was bad, wrong? Sinful?
That your body was something to cover up?
To feel shame about?
If so, it's only natural that you'd feel inhibited about nudity today. What you learn when young gets deeply imprinted on your mind, and in your cellular memory.
Becoming almost like a bad spell you live under, and can't seem to shake off.
Early Conditioning And Nudity
Do you want to let go? Do you feel that a life lived carrying the weight of all that conditioning is a limited one?
Yet does fear arises everytime you get close to challenging it?
A bit like an electric fence that you know is there? You feel fear every time you get close to it because it hurt you before. You're sure you don't want it to hurt you again, so you give it a wide berth.
But what if it was plugged out? What if there was no live current going through it anymore? What if it couldn't hurt you anymore?
If your belief that something can hurt you is strong enough, that belief will have more authority within you than the truth.
Old conditioning can live on in your cellular memory, as well as your mind. Supreme gentleness with yourself is what's required in dismantling it - easy does it.
Opening To A Different Possibility
Now, what if instead of all the shame-bound fear, you could be open to a different possibility?
That your nakedness is an affirmation of your innocence.
Because it's the way you came into the world - perfect.
What if you were to accept your beautiful nakedness, no matter what your body shape or size, as an antidote to shame?
Shame is one of the biggest barriers to intimacy; not just physical but emotional intimacy.
This was never your shame to begin with. Passed on through generation after generation it's time now to lay it to rest.
What if your inhibition or fear around being naked with a woman doesn't stem from childhood conditioning but from...
- Being overweight or having physical scars or conditions you're embarrassed about.
- Comparing yourself negatively with film stars or porn stars or the physical shape you were in 20 years ago.
- A belief you have a small penis.
- Having been humiliated or shamed by a previous lover.
- A lack of confidence after a crushing break-up.
- Being in an abusive relationship.
Have You An Internal Conflict Going On?
Or maybe you have an internal conflict going on because you're breaking an agreement with your partner?
In which case the fear and feeling of inhibition serves a purpose. It's doing a great job of warning you that you may be about to cross a line, one that it may not be in your best long term interest to cross.
You may be unwise to push past this fear because fear isn't always a bad thing. Sometimes it's how wisdom talks to you. If you have an internal conflict it's wise to resolve this before you move forward.
You would be wise to track what's behind your fear or anxiety and not to instantly assume it's a bad thing just because it feels uncomfortable.
Getting Over Your Inhibitions And Fears
If you want to get over your inhibitions and fears you have a choice...
To live paralysed by your fears.
Or by drawing forth courage from within, to gain victory over them and gain your freedom.
In anything you do in life, when you're expanding outside your comfort zone, fear will come up. That's normal. The question is whether you choose to let the fear win.
Or whether you find the courage in your heart to face it down. To choose to grow, to evolve, to expand.
"Life shrinks or expands in proportion to one's courage." Anais Nin.
Have you had enough of living your life with the ghosts of the past gathered around you?
Divine Ground Tantra Massage is a way to face your fear gently, and begin to melt your shame. It's a space where you'll be lovingly accepted, affirmed and held.
A space in which both giver and receiver are usually naked. In a beautiful experience of sacred intimacy that celebrates and honours the presence of the divine in each other.
If that feels a step too far for you, it's vital you honour that feeling and never move faster than the slowest part of you. Rome wasn't built in a day and life-long inhibitions aren't melted in a day either.
You may need an even gentler way to begin to unlock yourself from your prison within. Divine Ground Tantra Sex & Intimacy Coaching are fully clothed sessions and may be perfect for you if you wish to go more slowly.
Which feels like a better fit for you right now?