self diagnosing ed

Self-diagnosing Erectile Dysfunction?

Do you know it's the most normal thing in the world for a man to have the occasional experience of not rising to the occasion?

Because it's something many men experience from time to time?

Yet more and more men today find it difficult to accept this, and are quick to self-diagnose erectile dysfunction (ED).

Many are young to middle-aged men, who appear to be otherwise fit and healthy. Who are often in a state of shocked disbelief that this is happening to them.

Erectile Dysfunction? What's going on?

First of all it has to be said, there are and always will be men with actual E.D. Which can result from, among other causes; a medical condition or medication, physical injury, psychological problems, nerve damage, surgery or trauma to the body.

ED can also be the first sign of circulatory problems, which a man may not be aware that he has. So a medical check up is essential to first rule this out.

But none of the above answers this question...

Why today are men so quick to call what's natural, ED?

The cascade of emotions flowing from this self-diagnosis can be agonising. And there are few areas of life they don't spill into, as you'd be aware if it ever happened to you. 

So let's dive right in and explore this question.

Everything Happens In A Context

To begin, are we in agreement that everything happens in a context? A picture can exist outside a frame, but a life experience no matter how small or huge happens in a context?

For example, right now as you read this, where are you, what or who is around you? Are you on the train on your way to work, or relaxing in your favourite chair at home? What are you seeing, hearing, sensing around you? Are you alone or are others present? What are you feeling, thinking or believing? Remembering or projecting into the future?

All the above forms part of the context in which you're reading these words right now. The fact is, every breath you take, every thought, feeling or action happens within a context.

Now here's why the understanding of this is crucial to our exploration...

The Absence Of An Erection Takes Place In A Context

Because any moment in time when you don't have an erection that you expect to or want to takes place in a context.

The context can include any of the following and much more:

Your beliefs, conditioning, your heart's desire. Along with the memories of past experiences you bring with you. Whatever expectations you put on yourself. Your physical, mental and spiritual health in the moment too. As well as the surroundings you're in.

Also, the dynamic of the relationship between you and a partner you may be with. Not to mention their expectations of you. And the amount of alcohol or other drugs either or both of you have consumed. Which strangely enough, the latter is something that's often not taken into account!

Do you know?

Your body is an incredible field of intelligence that your ego mind tries to override at times.  

Now, Consider This Outrageous Possibility...

In the context of your life in any moment, an inability to have an erection may not be the catastrophe you imagine.

But intelligent information. Wisdom.

What if the lack of an erection at any moment isn't a problem, but a valuable feedback mechanism? That it's how your wise body is trying to get your attention, because something's off-track or out of alignment in your life?

For instance, if you...

  • Work 12 hours a day and spend another 4 hours commuting, your body may be so exhausted that it needs sleep, not sex! What you call ED may be your body's way of making sure it gets what it needs.
  • Work long hours and don't eat very well, are overweight, don't exercise, have a few drinks when you get home to relax. Is ED a problem, or a warning sign that it's time to make some healthy changes to your lifestyle?
  • Are stressed. Stress and erections don't make good bedfellows. So could your ED be warning you of the urgent necessity to find a way to reduce your stress levels? Before it gets worse and starts seriously affecting your health?
  • Want to meet a life partner yet you keep finding yourself with women who you know aren't her. Is what you call ED your body's way of trying to get you back on track with going for what you really want?
  • Masturbate to porn every day. Is any resulting ED the real problem? Or is it the underlying addiction, or what's underlying that? 
  • Feel under pressure to have sex that you don't really want. Is your lingam speaking your mind for you?
  • Are in a relationship in which the current dynamic between you and your partner could be vastly improved. In this case is ED a problem or a messenger?
  • Are in an abusive relationship. Domestic violence against men is still largely unrecognised. And it's the most normal thing in the world for any person to shut down sexually in an abusive relationship.
  • Feel guilt or remorse over something you did in the past, even decades ago. Something you've never been able to forgive yourself for. Is having problems with erections an unconscious way to punish yourself? Or to ensure, unconsciously, that you never re-enact that behaviour again?
  • If there's someone you want to give a piece of your mind to, yet you stay silent, are you aware that your throat and lingam are both channels of expression? Block one and the energy doesn't flow well through either. So is your ED telling you it's time to authentically express yourself? And stop strangling yourself with 'toxic niceness'?
  • Fear that a new relationship is getting serious too quickly. In which case having problems with erections can unconsciously be a great way to put the brakes on.

In all the above, can you see how the real problem isn't an inability to have an erection? On the contrary, the inability to have an erection is a signpost to the real issue to be addressed. 

Breaking The Spell

Over the years I've seen many men who arrive complaining of erectile dysfunction or dissatisfaction. Yet time and time again when we explored this in the context of their lives, they'd have a realisation of something they hadn't seen before.

Now that was often enough to break the spell they were under, the belief there was something wrong with them.

At other times it would become clear to a man that some action on his part was now necessary. But the relief at knowing there was nothing wrong with him was palpable. 

But What About The Cultural Context?

So while the above offers a glimpse into the personal context, what about the wider one, the cultural context?

Why today are many men so quick to call what's natural, ED?

Because an occasional inability to have an erection isn't seen as natural. And men aren't encouraged to take the context into account before arriving at the conclusion that they have a 'problem'.

The reality is, we live in an unnatural performance based culture. In which the relentless quest for increased performance in so many arenas results in burnout and breakdown.

And sex as a performance driven activity has lost touch with what's natural. With the connection to the heart, soul and awareness.

Sexual Energy - The Most Powerful Energy On The Planet

Sexual energy is the most powerful energy on the planet. With its own ebb and flow, rising and falling. It may be harnessed, ridden, exalted and rejoiced in as a vehicle and expression of the divine. Both used to create new life and to fuel and power an existing one.

Fuelled and powered by sexual energy, your erection has its ebb and flow, its rising and falling. Isn't it time you learned to trust this, to trust what moves through your body?

Do you know it's counter-cultural, revolutionary, to come down out of your head and feel.  To enjoy more everyday sensuality.

And to flow with your sexual energy connected with your heart and awareness. Rather than try to bend it to the will of your puny ego mind.

Follow The Money!

Of course it's a sad reflection on our time to note that the exploration of many topics today is incomplete without 'following the money'.

Yet this has probably more to do with answering the above question in the cultural context than anything.

Because make no mistake, ED is big business. With enormous investment made in finding solutions to this 'problem'. Not to mention profit.

So there's a reason why you're not meant to wake up to the truth that...

(a) It's normal to have occasional experiences of not being able to have an erection.

(b) The context can be the problem, not the man.

Because you're a source of profit when you have a 'problem' someone can 'solve'.

But why give your power away to any industry to 'fix' you if there's nothing wrong with you?

Is that wise? Or is there more wisdom in listening and paying attention to what your body is trying to tell you?

So What's The Solution?

So, when you have the occasional experience of not rising to the occasion, before self-diagnosing ED, you may find it more enlightening and empowering to reflect on these questions ... 

  • I'm given energy every day to run my life. To what am I giving so much energy that I don't have enough energy for an erection?
  • What is it about this situation that my wise body isn't happy with?
  • What am I trying to push myself into doing, that ALL parts of me aren't in alignment with?
  • Am I putting unrealistic expectations on myself? If so, would now be a good time to let them go?
  • Am I trying to live up to any agendas and expectations of others? If so, would now be a good time to drop them?
  • Would now be a good time to begin trusting what my wise body has to say to me about what it needs? 
  • And accept that may not always be an erection, but something else?

Would you love to have naturally stronger erections? Then check out the post below and take a transformative tip from nature...

Do You Want Naturally Stronger Erections? Then Take This Transformative Tip From Nature

Do you ever think,“My erection isn’t as strong as it used to be.”“How can I get back to the way things used to be?”“I guess

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Erectile dysfunction (ED) can be the first warning sign of a circulatory problem. A visit to the doctor is essential to rule out this possibility.

N.B. Nothing in the above should be taken as medical advice. Always see your doctor or a suitably qualified medical practitioner in relation to any health issue.

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